E n the end of my Twenties (and endless), I thought this: I had lived, at that time, the consequences of a choice made for a decade: In the fulfillment of dreams, when there was eighteen and I chose as I boarded the flight plan utopia. He knew that to achieve or at least touch her, or rather should leave aside everything humanly want in life, family, work, home, friends ... I got no return ticket and flew to a destination that I promised universal love I train to help the needy, and offer me absolute freedom and depth of soul more exquisite than any human being can enjoy. Only had to pay in return, as the price of conquest: choose every day austerity, discipline, not belonging to anything or anyone silence and solitude. The key to advance each step in these coordinates was a good deal of joy and faith ... in return, my soul and my fingers would play at least the fantasy of "it" that moves us forward each day: happiness. Well, living in that effort came through the front door a childhood friend with whom I had shared tennis matches and bike rides, we recognize that it did not get along, always seemed a thought, but at that meeting came the rapture, the body of a man connected with my body for women (from childhood had not seen) and his idealistic heart platonic love with mine. A partir de ahí, ese fantasma rondó mi vida durante los siguientes ocho años, en todas sus cartas siempre escribía la misma posdata: “Hasta que no estés conmigo no serás feliz”. Nunca contesté sus escritos, sin embargo él seguía apareciendo en mis noches más vacías y en los momentos en los que mis manos deseaban acariciar. Pasados esos años volvimos a encontrarnos y nuevamente nuestros ojos se reconocieron, hablamos de la eternidad que nos había separado.
Él por entonces vivía en un hospital de África como médico voluntario y yo pasaba de destino en destino por toda la geografía española persiguiendo mi anhelo. Intuíamos that our lives will surely be better would live together but we could not show until you prove you know the reality of day-to-day. Since I was not willing to lose a single opportunity or more years prolong what was probably a matter of days, I went back, I left my life of commitment, my country, my language, my work and my friends again ... for the second time it I left everything and went to where this year he was specializing in tropical medicine, London. And at Heathrow, with only a glance and in that space condensate meetings and partings, enough to realize that it was not what I wanted .- Perceptions are always mutual and reciprocal only that one party has the ability to receive them before or first define and express them precisely in order not to delay in pain and frustration and your soul is able to capture in eternal seconds. It was my choice and I assumed with all its consequences, at first logically as I could, it is clear that it is easier to live a success that a defeat ... the next day we said goodbye, no dramas, from the natural sense of reality. I rented a room, I looked up the colorful life in that country, after a year and with a bag full of learning and experience, I returned to my homeland.
been almost another twenty years and that I just wrote is a story in my life. I'm still learning and drawing conclusions, none of them in this final because I do not think, although, of course, are approximate. The important thing, I think, is keep walking and believe that what we really want is still alive only expected to live and succeeded in electing. Only time can whisper to those who choose not to live was a wise choice.
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